Staying Clean & some housekeeping

I've been off social media for some time now. I don't really remember when, but I think it's been about 2 months. I remember watching a ted talk where this spoke of never having a social media account, and how he was better off without. He didn't give much productivity shit, but just said that it was nice without it. I was having dinner when I saw that. I remember washing the dishes and immediately deactivating instagram. I kept WhatsApp. I still have an active Facebook account, I go there only to read stuff I used to write back then. I didn't deactivate because I like re reading them.

This isn't the first time I am going off social media. I've tried this many times, but eventually my resolve mutated into a new set of excuses like the readership and reach of my blog. The readership hasn't gone down, which didn't come as a surprise. I already knew that few people gave a damn about what I wrote. It was usually a pathetic attempt to try to curb the episodes of loneliness and depression (not clinical depression) I would fall into. All those times, I would text people saying that I was going off these handles, even though I don't think people really gave a damn. People who I hoped would give a damn rarely told me when they took time off(No hard feelings though). This time I didn't, and as usual nothing changed. At the same time a couple of people who wanted to reach out found me as well. So I guess the guy who gave the ted talk knew his shit.

I wouldn't say it has been enlightening, this decesion. I still find it difficult to find time to write, or struggle with reducing my screen time. Yet I guess the lack of instagram is one less excuse to unlock my phone, or to log on to my laptop. Also, there is this certain pride in knowing that I have been clean for such a long time. I am not gonna lie, I feel on top of my world on such rare moments of realisations. (I joined Reditt since then, but I use it Rarely, on weekends or so.)

The very reason I started writing this is because I know I am on the verge of relapsing again, and that is not something I have the mental bandwidth to accept. I thought if I wrote something that commemorated my decesion, it would be impetus to move forward, however insignificant it maybe.

On other news, it's been sometime since I wrote something creative, and I have a feeling that my readers would like something creative from my side. Not everyone enjoys such random life updates, most of us have our own life to be busy about. I write mostly because it's nice to keep writing, also if someone smiles at the end of the rant, it's a win for me. Also writing about moments in life I guess will serve as some kind of memorabilia in the years to come. Again, I don't have much material memories of my childhood, the few I have is in a land that's an ocean apart from home. On other news, I just completed reading Emperor Of Maladies, and it has been a rather heavy, yet satisfying read. I really wanted to finish the book in hard copy, but it was my Kindle who saw me through and lay by my side as I stared at the humming fan this afternoon, trying to process all that I have been reading over a month. Perhaps I'll write about it sometime, provided that I come over the physical constraints which ironically gives me a lot of reading time.

Until Next Time.